Why the Dismissive Avoidant is Most Likely to Cheat When a dismissive avoidant (DA) enters a long-term relationship like a marriage, their partner becomes a high stakes partner. That means emotional intimacy with them starts to feel overwhelming—which triggers the DA’s default mode: suppression. But here’s the twist… DAs do crave connection and vulnerability. They just don’t know how to do it safely with someone they feel responsible to. So they find what we call a low stakes partner—someone out
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How to Combat the Dismissive Avoidant’s Defensiveness in Conflict When you’re in conflict with a Dismissive Avoidant (DA), remember: direct demands and ultimatums usually backfire. The DA nervous system is wired to perceive pressure as control, which triggers shutdown, defensiveness, or even stonewalling. Instead, try this: Lead with what feels good. Instead of saying “You never spend time with me”, reframe it into something affirming: ➡️ “I love it when we spend time together without our phones
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